gumption is one of my favorite words

There have been a few times in my professional career where I've walked into a room and surprised someone with the gumption I've displayed. At Georgia Tech, I walked into the Athletic Director's office and told him that I was going to get my way through hell or high water. As a brand new engineer, I told my boss's boss that I would not release product because I couldn't tie my name to bad science. And this past week, I told our senior management team that I can't support a project that I don't agree with.

Jonathan Sacks wrote, "We bear responsibility for what we could have prevented, but didn't." Martin Luther King said, "A time comes when silence is betrayal." Sometimes, you have to say no because saying nothing is the same thing as saying yes to something you don't believe in.

Standing up for what I believe in at the Unite for Sight conference in New Haven, Connecticut.

As time goes on, it gets easier to say "no" to things you don't stand behind. Sure, sometimes it's still scary. You don't necessarily know what the consequences are, or how it changes the perception of you in someone else's eyes. But we are responsible for the design of our own lives. And I have infinite respect for people who display the gumption to say "no" - pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically - to the things that they can't justify doing.

Likewise, I am continually amazed by people who have the courage to unabashedly go after what they want. People who aren't afraid to have difficult conversations. People who harbor no pretenses and make no compromises. I'd like to think that one day I'll have that kind of gumption. I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it. 

what i don't understand about "busy" people

Sawra values sleeping, eating, and chewing on everything in sight. And it shows. (please do not reproduce without permission)

Everyone has 24 hours in a day. No more. No less. Everyone, or at least, the fully functional adults among us, has a choice of what they get to do with their 24 hours. Some value sleep. Some value work. Some value family, or friends, or athletics. We choose what those values are, and we choose how we manifest them. Which is why it amazes me that people still use the excuse "I'm too busy!" (read the part about being addicted to "busy")

No, you're not too busy. You just don't value what I'm asking you more than you value what else you're doing. And that's fine. They're your values, not mine. Trust me; I get it. I've been "busy." I've had (and still sometimes do have) 18- and 19- hour days, back to back (to back). I've been through engineering school and a political campaign (at the same time). But in each of those situations, I still had the choice of designing my life to fit those things that I valued.

Case in point: the traditional workplace is designed by people who value early mornings (and apparently going to bed at 9 PM). Unfortunately, I value late evenings with family and friends, and I value sleep. I value waking up and going for a run. I value having 30 minutes, before I do anything else - before I shower, before I take the dog out, before I check my email - to have time to write and sketch and ideate. And I value doing all of those things before I leave for work at 7:45 AM. So I design my mornings to accommodate for them. But I also value my work, and sometimes, these other things that I value get sacrificed to maintain the trust of my team and the integrity of my work.

The point is, what we value comes out in our actions. We are no busier than anyone else, our actions no harder, our lives no more challenging. We value what we value, and we put those things first, and we can't force those thoughts or priorities on anyone else. I think Stephen Covey says it best:

"... You have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage - pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically - to say 'no' to other things. And the way you do that is by having a bigger 'yes' burning inside. The enemy of the 'best' is often the 'good'.

So it's worth asking yourself if you really live in a way that promotes those values. If you value your family, do you regularly make time for them each day or week? If you value your relationship with God (Shivji, Allah, Jesus, Yeshua, nonbelief, etc.), do you actively pray and make time for reflection? If you value your health, do you exercise routinely?

Or, are you too "busy"?

learning to say no

Something I've struggled with for a long time. I think lots of people do - they know they should, they want to say no, but they end up saying yes anyway.

From Covey:

"I don't mean to imply that you shouldn't be involved in significant service projects. Those things are important. But you have to decide what your highest priorities are and have the courage - pleasantly, smilingly, nonapologetically - to say 'no' to other things. And the way you do that is by having a bigger 'yes' burning inside. The enemy of the 'best' is often the 'good'.

Keep in mind you are always saying 'no' to something. If it isn't to the apparent, urgent things in your life, it is probably to the more fundamental, highly important things. Even when the urgent is good, the good can keep you from your best, keep you from your unique contribution, if you let it."

... it's that nonapologetically bit that gets me.